AFTER a long day, one of those where you barely get time to stop, the last thing we fancied was cooking.
Bellies were rumbling, the sun was going down — grabbing a supermarket meal deal? Not tonight. Since we were in the area, we thought we’d give Diplocks Café a try.
I’d heard plenty of great things, loads of glowing reviews, but at the end of the day, it’s just a café, right? Well, that’s what I assumed. I wasn’t expecting anything out of the ordinary — just a quick, no-fuss meal so we could eat and get home.
First Impressions? — Inside, it’s bigger than you’d think. Spacious, clean, and well laid out — none of that cramming tables together just to fit more people in. Then we spotted the menu — and suddenly, expectations started shifting. Full English, omelettes, burgers, grills, jacket potatoes, pizzas, even a Sunday roast. They’ve thought of everything, even catering for allergies. But what really caught my eye?
The 30-minute fry-up challenge plastered on the wall — a monster breakfast for £25, and if you manage to finish it solo, you get your money back — of course, this is completely unachievable, but I can imagine the entertainment value of watching someone attempt it!
On to the food — We ordered a couple of pizzas — Bucharest (gammon, mozzarella, winter salami, fresh sweet jalapeños, chilli base, dried chillies) and Meat-Za-Ball (Moroccan meatballs, pepperoni, sweetcorn, ghost mix pepper). Both 12.5” and only £9.99 each. Also grabbed a garlic pizza with cheese (£6.99) and a few milkshakes.
Now, I’ll be honest — I wasn’t expecting much. How many times have you ordered a pizza, thinking it’ll be decent, only to be met with a soggy bottom? Too many. But these? Spot on. Perfectly cooked, great balance of toppings, packed with flavour. You can tell they actually care about what they’re serving, rather than just throwing together whatever’s easiest. And the garlic pizza bread? Best I’ve had. No contest. Proper garlicky, crisp, and just the right amount of cheese — not overloaded, not dry, just perfect.
Service? Couldn’t fault it — The staff were brilliant — way more attentive than you’d expect in a place like this. Friendly, happy to have a chat, and nothing was too much trouble. That kind of service makes a real difference, especially when you’re tired and hungry.
Extras? A nice surprise — They had garlic sauce, BBQ sauce, and a homemade chilli sauce that was next level. You could tell it was properly homemade — thick, full of flavour, none of that thin, watery bottled stuff. We also got a fresh Turkish salad, and when I say fresh, I mean fresh — zingy, vibrant, and the perfect contrast to the richness of the pizzas.
They’ve thought of everything — Doesn’t matter what you fancy, they’ve got something for everyone. And it’s not just about the food — they genuinely look after people.
They offer free kids’ meals up to age four (just pay for a drink) and special OAP pricing, which I’ll definitely be mentioning to my Nan! You don’t see customer service like this in many places, especially at these prices. It’s clear they value their customers, and that alone makes it worth supporting.
Fancy a night in? No problem — One thing I didn’t expect? How busy their takeaway service was. While we were eating, there were constant streams of people coming in and out, picking up their orders. And if you don’t fancy leaving the house? They deliver!
So you can still enjoy all this fantastic food from the comfort of your own home — what’s better than that?
Coming back? Absolutely — I’m definitely coming back. Nial was telling me about some of his plans for the future, and I can’t wait to see how this place expands and grows. It’s clear they’re onto something great here, and I reckon this is just the beginning.
Final thoughts? — Great food, great service, great prices. You can’t ask for much more than that.
Diplocks Café, 11 Diplocks Buildings, Diplocks Way, Hailsham. BN27 3JF
Tel: 01323 370495
www.diplockscafe.co.uk
